Tuesday, 17 November 2009

5 Irritating Types Of People



People irritate me. I've listed 5 types below. Perhaps in time I will create another list.

1. Non-Vegetarian Vegetarians

I have nothing against vegans or vegetarians, but I don't understand why egg eaters claim that they're vegetarians.

Look, you're not a really a vegetarian if you eat egg, so why do you keep referring to yourself as a vegetarian, and then, when found eating egg, say that you're actually an eggetarian instead of a vegetarian? Why can't you just lose the charade and refer to yourself as an eggetarian in the first place?


2. People who Don't Read and Ask Dumb Questions

If you don't read, please don't bug me with your asinine comments describing how you think The DaVinci Code is the greatest contribution to literature ever. It's not my fault you don't read more, ergo I shouldn't have to suffer for your ignorance.

And you then have the nerve to ask me where you can get hold of a copy of Angels and Demons? Really? Never hear of a bookstore or library before?


3. People who use Management Speak

Please. Don't.

The more I hear you talk about 'touching base, getting ballpark figures and focussing on leveraging core competencies to integrate, execute and transform processes and emerging infrastructure for better collaborative functionality in order to get buy-in to implement streamlined deliverables and end to end, end-user centric, customer focused, out of the box solutions for the new, cutting-edge, Web 2.0 paradigm shift', the greater the temptation to dedicate the rest of my life to humiliating you in public.


4. People who break open date rolls because they don't know what they are

If I offer you a date roll, and you, not being schooled in the finer points of confectionery, don't know what a date roll is, I won't hold it against you if you ask me, instead of breaking it open to find out.

It may be embarrassing for you, but that's still better than you using your nails to break open a roll and then discovering there's a date inside and then putting it down because you don't like dates. No one else is going to touch that date roll now because you've messed it up.


5. People who don't know how to use a loo

On second thoughts, this is an obvious one. My solution is to have automatic locking doors that don't let you out of a stall until you flush and don't let you out of a loo until you wash up. Tadaaa!


Do you have any pet peeves? Feel free to use the comment section to rant.


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3 comments:

Roshmi Sinha said...

Ha! Ha!

Re: point #

If you go to Bengal or come across Bengalis (most of them, that is)... you'll discover that they simply cannot live without eating fish. Infact, they cannot imagine their lives without... what else... eating fish.

And fish is not listed under 'non-veg'... to the Bengali mind. Nothing fishy about it, though...

Daniel D'Mello said...

Well, I'm Goan so I get the fish reference. Fish is mandatory for lunch at my home everyday.

You know, I've actually come across other people, and non-Bengalis at that, who don't consider fish as non-veg. Very strange!

Roshmi Sinha said...

Nothing 'fishy' about it. Probably.. 'coz they do not run around on 2/4 legs, flap their wings or even go cluck, cluck or baa-baa... they are considered 'veg'.

Even egg is considered... veggie, in Bengal.

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